4 WAYS TO MANAGE YOUR EGO

 4 WAYS TO MANAGE YOUR EGO

Ego and selfishness are commonly criticised as bad things. But they’re also natural things to the human species. There is a camera inside our head installed by Mother Nature that tells us that life is all about us. It’s about our predicaments, our joys, our sorrows. All that matters, at the biological level, is us. The animal inside compels us to fend for ourselves, to put our own selves before others.
 In our developed social context, this ‘me’ behaviour and ‘me’ thinking is called ego and selfishness. Of course, as we became more social beings, teamwork gained importance too, so people had to develop a balanced sense of self versus the other in order to reap maximum benefits.
 Today we’ll see four ways in which to manage our ego so that our relationships and performance don’t get affected.
Practice empathy
Human beings are uniquely empathetic animals. Not only do we understand each other’s emotions, we actually feel each other’s feelings. When we see someone else crying, we actually feel sad ourselves. When we see someone doubling up in joy, we smile. Anger begets anger. Envy begets envy. So by carefully cultivating an empathetic character, we can build upon the natural empathy that nature provided us with. To do this, we can ask questions, be curious about other people’s lives, try to understand their point of view, and listen more than we speak. That way, we will be seen as a team player.
Be humble in victory
To know a man’s character, said Abraham Lincoln, give him power. There will be times when you win, and when you will be tempted to rub the defeated party’s face in the mud. But resist this temptation. Tomorrow, there may come a time when the roles are reversed. Be humble in your victory. Acknowledge the efforts of your opposition. Thank your good fortune, and always keep your head over your shoulders. Nothing screams ‘egoistic’ than someone who celebrates victory in a brash manner.
Be gracious in defeat
Equally, your behaviour in defeat will influence many people’s opinion of you. When you lose, instead of finding excuses for your defeat, find it within your heart to congratulate the victor warmly on their victory. The more you complain about your bad fortune, the sorer a loser you will look. Admit that on the day, the winner was better than you. By all means try your best to get better, and by all means allow your ego to make you competitive, but never let it be at the expense of the grace you show your opponent when you’ve lost.
Practice charity
Nothing puts your own place in the world in perspective than the act of giving. If you make a habit out of charity – both in terms of money and in terms of time – you will begin to see that you can take a step outside of yourself and tame your ego. After all, there is no dearth of worthy causes in the world. Pick one and be associated with it.
 

Rashmi Singh

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