The Zodiac Battle
You think you know your partner very well? There might be so many personality traits that you are unaware of. If not the only way, zodiac signs are the most fun way of discovering more about and making fun of the people you know. Besides notifying what kind of job is ideal for you and when you will be able to afford a house of your own, your sun signs are capable of revealing a lot more than you can imagine. Here are some crazy facts and personality traits your zodiac has imparted in you, which you never knew before. Enjoy!
Aries (March 21- April 20)
Aries take pride in being the number one sun sign, number one on the list that is. They are energetic and unstoppable when on a roll, almost too energetic and trying to be the best at everything which makes them look proud and reckless. It is in the nature of Aries to be at the helm of everything. They just can’t take ‘no’ for an answer and have to get on the top, no matter what. They are ferocious in their approach so they are likely to exert all their strength to achieve goals. If you are in the way of an Aries, you’ll be run over, without mercy. If your boss is Aries, it is recommended you quit or be reborn as Leo or Sagittarius because they seem to love people from these signs. If you catch Aries in a good mood, you’ll see that they are some of the most caring people around, who will find a way to get you out of trouble. They are fond of shopping, riding in big red cars and are likely to be leaders or rich stock brokers, so having a few Aries people in your friend list might be a good idea.
How They Drink – If you are having trouble pleasing them when they are sober, challenge them into a shot drinking contest. They are most likely to push beyond limits. This is when you should swoop in and get your job done. But don’t push them for more than two rounds if you can’t handle some flirting.
How They Make Love – It is a battle, a challenge for them. They will not quit till they achieve complete satisfaction for their partners and they will definitely try to better the last encounter, every time. Although Aries don’t like to make it last too long and try to hurry through the act so they can get back to other things. You better let them call the shots and hand over the control, they’ll love it.
Taurus (April 21-May 21)
If you wait for the wind to turn the magazine’s page for you, congratulations, you are a true Taurus. You would have been great as a prince, who has to do nothing at all but gets everything one might need in the world. You want all the goodness and wealth without spending a lifetime working for it. Taurus born people are more likely to settle down in a secure job or get married, than invest in a business or climb the Mount Everest, although you might spend some quality time at the foothills clicking photographs, not just because you like it, but because it doesn’t involve much physical activity. They are artistic in nature but are unlikely to create a masterpiece unless they stop cribbing about what’s gone and stop worrying about what’s coming. Their careful, patient and romantic persona makes them good at relationships, but don’t unleash the bull by preaching them about right or wrong.
How They Drink – ‘Hold the drink’ is their motto. They can drink a lot, yes, but don’t think if they should. Quite often bar fights or loud jokes involve the heavy drinking Taurus bulls. Till the time an argument about them being second best breaks the harmony, slightly drunk Taureans are fun to be with.
How They Make Love – A Taurus might be like an old car in bed, slow to begin but once switched on, goes miles before running out of fuel. You will have to seduce them and keep them interested. They believe in taking time and satisfying their partners because may be they just can’t let all the hard work go to waste.
Gemini (May 22 – June 21)
If you are in a conversation for 15 minutes and you haven’t uttered a single word, you are most likely in the pleasant company of a Gemini. They are restless and make sure that everyone in the group shares this feeling. They think fast and are almost always on a move, making them resourceful companions because they can get their way by pleasing people with their charming and outgoing personality or plainly by getting on people’s nerves. They don’t like to be restricted or being told things, so if you tell them to wear a uniform at work and keep quiet for more than 3 minutes daily, they’ll probably switch. They have so much going on inside their heads that sometimes they themselves can’t decide what they want. Their tendency to be constantly attracted by the most flamboyant person or thing around often leaves them with incomplete knowledge, although granting versatility.
How They Drink – You can’t really tell when they are drunk and when they are sober, which is a little dangerous to be honest. You never know when they’ll pass out in your arms while telling you anecdote number 997 from their ‘dear diary’. Change is in their blood so you will see a whole rainbow of cocktails shuffling in their hands every five minutes. Just be ready to catch your Gemini friend when you see the seventh colour been sipped down.
How They Make Love – Life is a game, so is sex. They’ll play like a child on its favourite ride, enjoying every moment. But don’t expect them to be on the same ride forever. Gemini born people are not known to be faithful lovers. They are attracted towards change as and when they see it. Sexual interaction doesn’t have to be deep and soulful, the atmospheric feel and playful desire is enough to satisfy a Gemini. When you are with one, watch out for pleasant surprises.
Cancer (June 22 – July 23)
There is nothing Cancerian about you if you don’t cry after watching a romantic film or after meeting an old friend or on a usual Saturday evening! Most of the charities are probably listed in the names of Cancerians around the world. They are caring, trustworthy, helpful and compassionate, that is why people around them tend to run away or hide because they are just way too clingy. They are too nice to hurt you otherwise but they’ll smother you dead if they are in love with you. They are creative and will often find out new ways to emotionally blackmail family and friends into situations where they ‘have to’ sit together and admire you. Cancerians can get along with most signs, but only Taurus, Virgo, Scorpio and Pisces can stand to have a compatible relationship with them.
How They Drink – If you have planned a surprised party and have invited your Cancerian friends, all you have to do is get them a vanilla drink and thank them for coming; they’ll be in love with you for eternity. Usually they prefer not to breach the comfort level of social drinking, but if a friend asks them to sip a few down, with a smile, they’ll drink a river dry. Almost no house party is complete without at least one emotional (gossiping) Cancerian.
How They Make Love – When it comes to sex, they are smooth, real smooth. Their personality demands giving, more than receiving, so you will be at the receiving end of some pretty sensuous and intimate love making if your partner is a Cancerian. For them sex is not just physical connection but something deeper and more meaningful than that. You can trust a cancer born person to be faithful to their partner as sex is too personal an experience to share with strangers.
Leo (July 24 – Aug 23)
Leos are those actors who get only one dialogue in the entire film, but want as much credit as the lead actor. The first king must have been a Leo, not just because they are strong individuals but because as a Leo, they think, it is their moral responsibility to tell everyone else what to do and how to do. They are very generous when it comes to taking care of their near and dear ones but the driving emotion will more likely be “they need me” rather than “I love them”. They are great people to have around you because of their habit of giving gifts, which might even bankrupt some of them, but you will be mighty pleased, as they get only the best things. They have an amazingly honest approach. They will first say that you are useless, then will guide you in the right direction, after which if you feel bad about their arrogance, they’ll motivate you and tell you with a smile, “You can’t do anything”.
How They Drink – Leos have the best sound system and entertainment units so always party at their place, plus they’ll always entertain you with a well choreographed dance performance after a drink or two, whether you want it or not. They can drink for sure and it would be totally inappropriate to tell a Leo to stop. There always will be a message from a Leo friend next morning saying “sorry for last night, I didn’t mean it” after they had shattered your ego the previous night. So don’t be around a drunken Leo if you are not good enough.
How They Make Love – Leos are great at sex. They are not necessarily concerned if their partner likes it or not, but they have to be good at what they are doing and they would need you to appreciate every move. You just keep telling them how amazing they make you feel and they’ll keep upping the ante. Honestly, what else do you want?
Virgo (Aug 24 – Sep 23)
Virgos want to be heroes but without getting dirty. They mistake themselves for perfectionists but they only manage to be labelled as uptight. There is one thing that you can’t take away from them is that they are hardworking and persistent. They would work extremely hard to analyse whatever is in sight or in existence and then would persistently try to criticise all, in whichever way possible. While their obsession with purity in all forms may make them intolerable for some, they are some of the most helpful and resourceful people. They are intelligent and are capable of making themselves perfect but have a strange liking for pulling themselves down from the ladder. Also they have a very good memory. They never forget to keep a grudge about a past event and bring it up at the very point when they are about to have a perfect kiss.
When They Drink – Virgos are practical people. They seldom drink more than their quota of booze. They have a complete log of their drinking encounters and they use this information to waste time at a party, thinking which drink would be perfectly intoxicating, while others are dancing their troubles away. They can be incredibly boring but are perfect partners for those who do not want to go home sloshed.
When They Make Love – They know exactly which food is aphrodisiac, where to touch and when to initiate, they just don’t do it. Their drive is planning and seeing it being executed properly. But making an effort to do something new or interesting is not their cup of tea. They like sex, but won’t show it. They have one well thought out, well researched plan of action and they would want to stick to it always. Any change will put them off. So allow them to put their research to work and enjoy a ‘textbook’ experience.
Libra (Sep 24 – Oct 23)
Libras are peace lovers, M.K. Gandhi can alone guarantee that. But for the rest of you, peace means sitting on the sidelines, comfortably away from decision making. Libras are quick to retreat from decisive moments and situations. How can they decide when they are so busy flipping a coin to see whether they want to go to the bathroom or not. They are good diplomats, often known for their special skills of promoting equality and fairly giving everyone their just due, although fair distribution takes place only after keeping a sizeable amount for self. They are good at relationships as they possess the virtue of empathy, which sometimes means turning their partner into their own replicas. This intellectual and artistic group of people includes the likes of Scott Fitzgerald, Sting, Eminem, Matt Damon and Kim Kardashian, all representing stark characteristics of a typical Libra. To sum it up, Libras are like those rich, highly self conscious people who attend open air concerts to look cool, but instead gaze into the sky wondering if space is an illusion and update their Facebook status as “Stop eating animals”, before putting on their designer leather shoes.
How They Drink – A charming Libra can always be seen in a party, chatting about something interesting. Such a person is very good to talk to once a subject has caught his/her interest. Even after a few rounds of Martinis, you can rely on a Libra to be in control of words.
How They Make Love – Sex is another balancing act for Libras. Pleasure should be equally divided between both the partners. The more intellectual Libras consider sex as intermingling of souls, it is about becoming one. It doesn’t necessarily mean that they would want to become one with the same partner. Often their day long wonderments take them to new meanings of fidelity and sexual interaction. But whenever they are in bed, they are meticulous and almost poetic.
Scorpio (Oct 24 – Nov 22)
There is only one word to define a Scorpion, ‘Raw’. Scorpio has always been categorized as the bad boy of the zodiac family, may be because of the bull-headedness or may be because of the mystery that engulfs it. They like to keep secrets and thoughts about you locked inside a corner of their mind. They never forget something good or bad done to them, so if you have ever done anything good for a Scorpio, you will receive undying friendship and love but if you have not been kind to them, you better find a black hole to vanish, because they will hunt you down one day. Their passion makes them attractive and dangerous. Good luck to you if you are trying to argue with a scorpion because you will never come out to be the winner. There isn’t a Scorpio-born who hasn’t done something that normal people categorise as weird. For them trying to achieve something impossible is the kick and they are most likely to get it, so you better get out of the way if you can’t match the intensity or you’ll be trampled.
How They Drink – Probably the best drinking partners. These are the guys who usually win at beer drinking competition. The secret of their capacity is, when their stomachs are full they start storing liquid in their head as they usually don’t like to carry their brains to such events. You can always see Leos cursing them, Libras avoiding them and Aries being beaten by them at booze parties.
How They Make Love – They are wild to say the least. Scorpions are known to be the most exotic lovers. They have a natural charisma that traps and attracts suitable prey. They don’t mind whether you are good looking or not, you have to be a passionate lover to be with them. In fact scorpions have a special craving to take the case of troubled personalities and turn them upside down. But don’t try to get them too excited as there is a chance that they’ll eat you up.
Sagittarius (Nov 23 – Dec 22)
If a Sagittarius had a million dollars, he would not put it in low yield bond; he would go to a casino, go all in a poker game with a 2, 7 hand and win. They are mercilessly blunt and often end up insulting their companions with their insinuating judgment. Do yourself a favour; do not ask for an honest opinion from a Sagittarius, unless you want to spend a day fighting depression. They are so confident of themselves that they can pull off a tuxedo on a beach or swimsuit in a church. Their larger-than-life approach often lands them in the disappointment zone but when they strike, they hit big. You don’t need any bigger and better testimony of this than Walt Disney, Frank Sinatra, Jimi Hendrix, Steven Spielberg and Bruce Lee, all Sagittarians. They need to be given space to realise their true potential so avoid suffocating them with restrictions if you want to get the best out of them. Though energetic most of the time, a shattered dream can really break their spirit so there should be someone there to tell them, “Dude! Be practical”, when they are thinking of building a home on Jupiter.
How They Drink – They are sloppy when drunk and they like to enjoy the moment by spilling secrets, so don’t tell them that you are a secret agent and if you already have, don’t give them any booze. As long as a party involves being happy, jumping around and mingling, they’ll be there. They can drink a lot and often are the ones to plan a drunken night-out or a random trip to a happening joint.
How They Make Love – They do not enjoy sex as much as they like to dream about an ideal relationship. If you are waiting for a Sagittarius to seduce you, you better mention that soon enough, because they won’t initiate anything. They have their moments but you will have to build a foundation and be all over them to get what you want.
Capricorn (Dec 23 – Jan 20)
A message saying “Sorry I was busy in a meeting, Happy Birthday” with a book on ‘How to be successful – by Capricorn Association’ as a gift, can only be the work of a true Capricorn or a Sagittarius making fun of them. They are diligent people, with a set of goals. They usually make a list of ‘things to achieve’ in the womb itself and start working towards it as soon as they are born. This is not something to boast about, it can really be frustrating, not just for them but for people around them, as well. They may not be misers but they are too practical to spend 10 grands on a romantic gift. It is not difficult to know them if you have an eternity to spend, trying to make them talk about themselves. Elvis Presley, Beethoven, Isaac Newton and Rudyard Kipling have made Capricorns proud but who is to say that these people were fun to be with.
How They Drink – The question should be ‘do they drink’? You will hardly find a Capricorn letting go at a party, dancing his/her worries away after downing a crate of beer. No sir! They are too practical to get intoxicated beyond the basic social requirement. But the good thing is that they would not preach you and are great to talk to about worldly stuff. So inviting them is not a problem; just don’t rely on them for entertainment.
How They Make Love – Sex with a Capricorn is like an official meeting. There is proper plan of action; there will be a presentation and a set of rules to achieve the pre-set goals. The venue and goals of the meeting may change from time to time but the methodology won’t change at all. Sounds boring and complicated? Well that’s what Caps are about.
Aquarius (Jan 21 – Feb 19)
Those who have 5000+ friends on facebook are Aquarians. They can be seen everywhere as they do not like to sit in one place, doing just one thing. The most amazing thing about them is also the worst. They have an extremely weird way of looking at things, which makes them unpredictable. Apparently things like wearing clothes, hanging out with same old friends and sticking to a well paying secure job are too human for them, so they get bored of this stuff quickly. If you are planning to spend your life with an Aquarian, be prepared to wake up one day to see your partner become a monk, ready to ‘walk the earth’ for the rest of the time. They are natural revolutionaries, trying to bring changes to the society around them, either through their actions, their music or through their knowledge about other worldly elements. Giving a cold shoulder to the sensitive and caring people is part of their job on earth. They are experts at making cry-babies feel guilty about their existence.
How They Drink – They would rather enjoy the company of drunken people than being one of them. Moreover, alcohol doesn’t make much of a difference to their personality or the way they see things. They are pretty smooth talkers in general and with this skill slightly heightened after 3 drinks, they will produce some very interesting conversations. You can rely on them to carry you when you are out and are good people to escort you to home as they can produce some really nice excuses.
How They Make Love – Can you imagine how it would be to share a bed with a person who is intrigued by almost everything he/she sees and is keen on finding the ‘real reason’ behind its existence? It would be an adventure if you can solve the puzzle of their needs and likings. Normally people fail to understand whether their Aquarian partner is giving positive or negative signals, making sex a complexity. But once you understand and connect with their thought process, you will be shown a whole new world of physical and subconscious intimacy.
Pisces (Feb 20 – March 20)
“I know what you should do; I will help you find the solution. Just come pick me up, I am kind of lost”. You do not need to be an astrologer to conclude that the person saying something like this can only be a Piscean. Being the last one on the list, they are supposed to be the most mature ones out of all signs, but they usually forget who they are. Pisceans are mutants, they borrow the elements of all sun signs and make their own little genome machine, which often malfunctions. They are emotional and sensitive; on top of that they are selfless, which is the password for self destruction. They often confine themselves in their own dreamy world, where they craft imaginative ideas, which are usually bluntly rejected in the real world. Dreamy Pisceans are not the richest people on earth so if you are planning to settle down with one, you better start saving up. They are great lovers and loyal friends who carry an emotional medical box to heal their near ones.
How They Drink – Pisces are fishes; they do not have any problem drowning in any amount of alcohol. They like feeling dizzy as it allows them to stay connected with the world of imagination and they can do this for a long duration of time, making them some of the last men standing. They are surprisingly interesting to talk to after a long drinking session, may be because nobody is conscious by then.
How They Make Love – Pisceans are givers. They make sure that their partners gets everything they desire of, even sacrificing self interests in the process. They can adapt well with the quality of the partner sign, providing for a fulfilling experience. You will have to find out and give your Piscean partner what they want because they themselves will never tell you.