Studies show that a vast majority of working people fantasize about their colleagues and superiors at work. While this is a natural phenomenon, there is a difference between harmless fantasies and turning them into reality. We give you five ways in which you can handle this situation.
We spend more time at our offices than at our homes. Given this fact, it is only natural for some of us to have passing romantic feelings towards our colleagues. Sometimes, you may even end up having a crush on your boss. While the butterflies in the stomach and the quivering lips can be fun when the crush begins, it is possible that you’re sliding down a slippery slope.
Here are a few ways you can ‘manage’ this situation.
1. Ask yourself the tough questions
It is possible that you’re confusing admiration and attraction with love. Human beings – especially women – are hardwired to feel attracted towards people who hold powerful positions and who are authority figures. Is it possible, then, that your crush on your boss is a result of his position and not his personality?
2. Talk to your friends
This will work better for women than men, because men don’t talk to anyone about their feelings that easily. But make the effort to seek out that one friend or confidante who will understand your predicament without judging you. Please don’t confide in your colleagues, because office ‘news’ like this often ends up being a rumour, and before you know it everyone’s talking about you behind your back.
3. Are you being manipulated?
While we’re in love, we feel that the entire world is good. But it pays to remember that people take advantage of other people’s emotions and feelings all the time. (If you look in the mirror closely, even you may have done it in the past.) Ask yourself if your boss is leading you on deliberately with the intention of securing an advantage.
4. Exercise self-control
Pay particular attention to your body language around the person you like. You may inadvertently pick up habits such as dressing to impress and going the extra mile in your projects to get noticed. Avoid this, and be as normal as possible.
5. Be aware of mutual attraction
It is entirely possible that your boss is attracted to you too. If this happens, the temptation to take things to the next level may be too hard to resist. But stop and ask whether your personal lives allow a relationship (one of you, or both, may be married, for instance). Also find out what your workplace’s guidelines are regarding office romances.